Dating Profiles that Work like
Magic
Design Your Online Dating Profile to Find "The
One"
 For years you've heard about Online Dating; you
may even have friends who met on the Internet. Online dating is now the most common way single adults meet
worldwide.
When you join any dating site, the first thing you're asked to do is create
an Online Dating Profile. But with so many people looking for love on the Internet, how will your dating profile get
noticed? If you're new to online dating, or you've posted your online dating profile on a few sites with limited
success, here are some tips that can help you. Keep reading - there's a secret to doing it right!
Online Dating
Profiles
Where To Begin?
One way to design your dating profile is to start by asking yourself: "Do you know
who and what you want in a partner - and what it is you're looking for in a relationship?"
Learn to elaborate - "short and sweet" doesn't work in a dating profile, in much
the same way as it doesn't work in sales. Longer dating profiles work better - much better - from
my 20 years of experience.
In the world of advertising it is often said that "The more you tell, the more you
sell." For one thing, the way computer matching is done, the more content-rich your dating profile, the more
matches you will get on many dating sites. As an additional benefit in creating a longer profile, your matches will
see that you have more depth... more to say of interest... and a richer life experience overall. That potentially
will make you a better partner. When you think about it, at their most fundamental level, relationships are an
extended conversation. Your online dating profile can start the conversation on a high note. A scrimpy profile may
tell your matches you're boring. Which first impression would you prefer?
It is always best to get help before you start writing your dating profile, because there's a world
of difference between an "average" dating profile and a dating profile that grabs your reader's
attention.
In other words, design your dating profile correctly, and you'll be much more
likely to meet the person you've been dreaming about. Having a great dating profile can make the difference between
your falling in love - or going through endless coffee dates that ultimately end up going nowhere.
Online Dating absolutely does work, and you can make it work for
you. You'll just need to follow some basic guidelines.
Creating Online Dating
Profiles
Where am I Going
Wrong?
While it makes sense to portray yourself in the most flattering way possible,
honesty is the best policy in your dating profile. Far too many people make the mistake of posting incorrect or
misleading information in their dating profiles with disastrous results as the outcome. For example:
Age - Though members of both sexes
are guilty of "fudging" the numbers on their dating profiles, this practice is more common among women. While there
are a number of reasons you may be tempted to shave some years off your age, beginning a new relationship with a
lie sets a bad precedent.
Photo - Have you posted a photo on
your dating profile that doesn't look much like you anymore? Much of the time, this may seem innocent enough. You
don't have any recent photos or maybe you think you look great in that 10-year-old picture. Find a friend with a
digital camera and get some new ones. (And contact my office for the latest photo guidelines). Posting recent photos on your
dating profile will avoid the proverbial moment of disappointment.
Online Dating Profiles
Common Turn-Offs
The following strategies used by both men and women tend to be self-defeating. So
here are several things NOT to do when creating an online dating profile to meet
singles.
Men tend to run in the other direction from online dating profiles of women that
are:
♦ Too
demanding - Every woman is looking for Mr. Perfect, right? Sometimes, single women mistake their
dating profile for a short order menu. If your online dating profile states that you want Brad's Pitt's looks with
Warren Buffet's money and Steve Job's intelligence, you may inadvertently be scaring off "Mr. Perfect For You."
Many men are turned off by online dating profiles like these. The bar is simply set too high and many quality men
will refuse to compete.
♦
Leave no room for him - Many men appreciate an independent
woman with a life of her own. But if you overstate the point in your online dating profile, making it clear that
you don't "need" a man because of your job, hobbies, outside interests and friends, you may turn off potential
dates who don't want to feel like your last priority.
♦
Greedy - It's easy to understand your concerns about a man's
financial status. If he's jobless, or 40 years old and still living with his parents, this could be a significant
issue. But if your dating profile includes your financial criteria (even stated indirectly) many men may wonder
what you're truly looking for.
Women get turned off by online dating profiles from men that are:
♦ A thinly veiled disguise for a "one night stand." - It's the oldest story in the
world, but unfortunately, some men who create online dating profiles are just looking for opportunities to "hook
up." Don't be one of them. If all you're looking for is a casual relationship, just come out and say so.
♦ Arrogance - Many women find men with self confidence interesting. But you can
easily cross the line between confidence and cockiness when you choose dating profile photos that are too
revealing. Even if you're proud of the results of your recent workout regimen, keep your shirt on in your online
dating profile.
♦ Your net worth - You may be very successful in your career, and enjoy the finer
things in life, but quality women want to see more than your ability to make money. Don't brag about what you have.
If that were enough in life, you wouldn't be creating an online dating profile in the first place,
right?
Creating Online Dating Profiles
Other Tips and Advice
We've discussed the importance of understanding yourself, your needs and your
wants - before creating your online dating profile. The following suggestions may also
help.
1. Too much hard-selling in a dating
profile won't work for either sex. Including examples of your personal style work far
better than simply making claims to having it. A dating profile is the place to demonstrate romance and your poetic
nature. The instrumental word here is "demonstrate."
2. While creating an online dating
profile, it is better to say too much about your Life Experience rather than not enough. But use good
judgment in what you include in your dating profile. While avoiding any mention of traumatic life events, the
reasons you hate your ex, or other generally inappropriate topics, the truth is that most people don't share enough
in their dating profiles. Your dating profile is like an online brochure - the more you share, the better. But
always keep in mind that your potential matches will be reading your dating profile and thinking, "Will I enjoy
myself by meeting this person?" So think in terms of "benefits" to the reader, much like in advertising anywhere
else. Use your online dating profile to create some atmosphere.
3. Finally, spell check your
writing! Treat your online dating profile with the same amount of care and respect that you would a business
card or resume. Your happiness is on the line!
One Final Recommendation
Get Help Creating your Online Dating Profile
Designing an effective dating profile is
the number one coaching request I get from clients worldwide. Working together by phone, I'll help you get
off to a good start. There is just too much at stake to try creating your online dating profile all by
yourself.
There's a reason you clicked on this article. There's so much confusion, and so
little expertise, when it comes to developing solid online dating profiles. And here's where you can get some
help!
Online Dating
Help is just a phone call
away!
Website Content © 2010 Jay Reiss, M.S.W.
The Online Dating Coach
All Rights Reserved
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